Tis the Season to Be Tempted

How is everyone coping with the delicious treats that surround us during the Christmas Season?  At my workplace many high-calorie treats are within my reach.  A lot of my co-workers bring in baked assorted Christmas cookies, Christmas fudge with nuts, the largest box of chocolates I've ever seen in my life, peppermints, and the list goes on and on.  Tomorrow morning our Supervisors are catering a staff breakfast for everyone, which will include many healthy and not so healthy items.

I have made a mindful decision to continue to drink my shake in the morning, a hard-boiled egg for a snack, and a small salad for lunch.  Even though the temptation is right under my nose, (literally right next to me), I have not touched a cookie, a candy, or the fudge!  I'm very happy with my decision not to indulge!!!! Tomorrow morning at the staff breakfast, I will be too busy to step into the room filled with many different varieties of food, which is a blessing in disguise!  I have a pack of gum inside my desk and chew it whenever I feel the need to chew.  I always keep a pack of gum in my purse, and wherever I go I always have gum handy.  It helps me get through the day!  I also have been drinking a lot of water since there are many people around me with bronchitis, colds, and other contagious ailments that I don't want to become infected with  as a result of not sleeping and eating poorly.

It's not easy to be around all of these treats, and many people eat a lot during the Christmas celebrations, but I'm choosing to remain faithful since my addiction to food will always be with me throughout my life.  I know that if I have a candy, I will not be able to control myself.  It will signal me to have another and another and another until the box is empty!  I know if I begin to eat a cookie, I will not be able to stop at one.  I'll have to have at least five or six.  Why torture myself and my body?  I cannot afford to hurt myself anymore.  I feel proud of my decision to turn away from the temptations, and as a result, I'll be better off in the long run.  My self-awareness is very strong right now, and I'm grateful that it's keeping me honest.

Stay true to your journey and you'll be happy you did!

Linda Hegedus, ©

Feeling Grateful

Thanksgiving will be here soon.  It's a day to be grateful and thankful for all of our blessings bestowed upon us.  Many people in our lives are saddened when the holidays come since their loved ones may no longer be with them in celebration.  There are many poor and homeless people who are alone and hungry.  As most of us are blessed and remain very thankful and grateful, we can lend a helping hand to those who are in need of love, kindness, comfort, or a good home-cooked meal and a warm place to sit at the table.

Let our hearts be open, and pray for those who require assistance at this time.  Let our souls give unconditional love and support to others as we celebrate this day of harmony and togetherness with one another.  On this special day we remember that we were given support, love, and caring when we needed it the most during our personal journey.  As we sit with our family and friends, we enjoy and cherish the time spent with the people who mean the most to us.   We cannot focus on all of the food that's prepared, but only eat enough to satisfy our hunger.  There's many foods that we can enjoy that are healthy and nutritious.  Turkey is high in protein and very filling.  Sweet potatoes contain many nutrients and vitamins.  Green beans, peas and carrots, or broccoli also are rich in calcium and rich in vitamins.  How about dessert?  Make or bring your dessert.  Prepare a low-calorie gelatin dessert, which is good with low calorie cool whip on top. A fruit salad is also tasty with pineapple, strawberries, blueberries, and some mango to give it great color.

It's a challenge to celebrate this day as it's known to be quite a feast.   We should plan ahead on what we're going to eat; here are some suggestions.  If you're at home, or bringing a dish, prepare an appetizer filled with raw carrots, celery, raw mushrooms, cauliflower, and peppers.  For the dip you can bring three different types of hummus.  There's a great roasted pepper flavor, or garlic flavor, or a spicy flavor for variety.  We can enjoy the celebration and remain true to our journey.  If you're a guest, request a smaller dinner plate to eat on so you don't pile on too much food.  Also drink water instead of soda, wine, or any other beverage that will contain a lot of calories.  Once we begin to feel full, stop!  Continuing to eat may ruin your day and the feeling of being uncomfortable will remain with you for hours to come.

May all of you have a happy, healthy, and safe Thanksgiving.  Peace and Love to all.

Linda Hegedus, ©

 

A Lot Can Change In A Day!

 

As Esther Phillips sang, “What a Difference a Day Makes” 24 little hours ….Yes one day can make all of the difference!  Did you ever eat a food item that contained too much sugar, and consumed a larger than normal amount, that you ended up craving more sugar?  It’s a vicious cycle of wanting, needing, and feeding that old addiction to what we used to crave the most.  It's what satisfied our inner-being, or so we thought.  I found myself wanting and craving something sweet.  Although, I must confess that I did indulge in a temporary moment of weakness and enjoyed the moment.  As I began to eat something sweet and savoring the taste and the feeling it gave me; it was as if I was taking a drug that made me feel comfortably numb.

Comfortably numb on food, that is…. The high didn’t last long, and like any addict, all I wanted to do was sleep it off.  It felt like I was buzzed on sugar.  It began with the first piece of candy, which led to another piece, and yet another piece of delicious candy.  I felt the old me coming out for a while, and in the moment of this feeling, I was aware that my old behavior was beginning to emerge.  If just for that moment…. I felt free and naughty at the same time.  I knew what the consequences were going to be if I continued, but it didn’t stop me from doing this to myself.  I justified this behavior as I was good for so long, and always stayed true to my routine, but just having that sugar led to becoming out of control until I felt like vomiting.  I was intoxicated with sugar.  My pants began to tighten up, and my feet and hands began to swell.  I was so doped up on sugar that when I walked upstairs to my bedroom, my head was pulsating very hard as if I was going to have a stroke.

I know what I’ve done and was afraid, but as a drug addict or an alcoholic reacts to their demise, they sleep it off.  That’s exactly what I did was sleep it off.  When I woke up the next morning, I felt a little off, disconnected, and physically very tired.  It was as if I had a hangover from the indulgence of partaking to the sweets and treats.  I realized that old part of me which I thought was buried for good, came out and will always be silently sitting within me.  Just like a drug addict that takes that drug for the first time after being clean for so long, they want more and more, or the alcoholic who’s been sober for years and slips into having a drink, and realizes they can’t stop.  I felt that way as well with eating high carbs, which led me to wanting sugar!!!!

 

After taking a long and hard look at myself, and what this habit would do to me long-term, I said to myself I cannot do this anymore.  I was mortified that I explored that area, and thought that aspect of my being was long gone, but when it resurfaced, I knew it would always be a part of who I was but not who I am now.  It’s almost 5.5 years out from my RNY Gastric Bypass surgery, and the dumping syndrome was apparent, but it seems as the years pass by, it’s not nearly as prominent.  This week I’ve been back to my healthy lifestyle, which includes my supplements, and eating an all organic plant-based diet, in addition to drinking 74 ounces of water; and walking for ½ hour of five laps around the track, which is one mile and a quarter.  Since this weekend was mild outdoors, I rode my bike on the trails as well. 

 

“What a Difference a Day Makes”, 24 little hours came to my mind when I seen my pants are already loose, and the excess fluids were flushed out from my inflamed body caused by the extreme sugar intake.  My mind is clear once again, and I feel energized!  My hands and feet are not swollen, and my head is not pounding.  Thankfully I got back on track immediately and realized in one day you can turn it all around for the better!

Linda Hegedus, ©
 

Welcoming the Fall

Now that the Fall season is here, it’s a great time to enjoy the beautiful foliage that surrounds us, especially if you live in the Northeast.   There’s so much to do with your family and friends.  Many towns provide Fall festivals with activities such as apple, pumpkin, and berry picking; as well as walking through a corn maze and enjoying a scenic hay ride.

Perhaps you’re decorating your home with bright and colorful mums to create a Fall theme to last well into late November.  There are also many Fall craft fairs to attend and community walks for a cause that you may want to become involved with to serve and feel you’re making a difference in a person’s life.   The rails to trails are throughout the state and offer not only beautiful picturesque walks, but also an enjoyable bike ride that gives just the right amount of exercise you require for the day.

Winter will be here before you know it, so you don’t want to miss out on what this beautiful time of year has to offer.  Get outside, beautify your living space for the upcoming festivities, and connect with your community.  Most of all enjoy the season!

Linda Hegedus

The Good I Do Today Will Pay Off Tomorrow

 

There may be days when you ask yourself did I do enough today that was beneficial to my new lifestyle?  As some of you know who are maintaining your weight, it's often a challenge to attend events that accompany many food items and may defeat our daily routine.  When I was morbidly obese, I used to observe and then ask thin people what were they eating to be the size they were, and I often received many different answers.  For some thin people they ate whatever they wanted and never exercised.  That used to baffle me and I couldn't understand how and why this happened?  The obvious answer is that their genetic make up gave them a "free pass" but for many of these thin people, their health issues were not obvious by looking at their appearance.  One man had cholesterol issues and his numbers were well over 400.  So as the old cliché goes, looks can be deceiving.

Other people who were thin indicated that they had a glass of wine every day, and watched what they ate, and walked every day after dinner.  Then there were thin people who told me they would be obese if they didn't watch the amount of calories they were taking in on a daily basis, and exercise was essential to their maintenance program.  I now understand that I am a thin person, who has to watch my caloric intake, and I also have to monitor how much activity I'm doing on a daily basis.  I can very easily become obese again, but the difference is that this time I will not allow the scale to move upward where I cannot realistically get back to basics.  Maintenance is an on-going task that I don't take lightly.  One day you may eat a food item that is not beneficial, but if you get back on track immediately, you've succeeded in not allowing yourself to eat the same way tomorrow and the next day, etc.

That's progress and it's remaining honest with yourself.  We all know that if we turn back to our destructive habits, we will begin to destroy ourselves once again.  We must remain in check every day and monitor ourselves closely.  Making the decision to either give in to a moment of a short-term compulsion, or be pleased with ourselves knowing we cannot do this anymore and we'll only benefit by eating beneficial, healthy, and fat- burning foods, which will provide us with feeling good mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.  We must save ourselves in the moment of temptation and instant gratification we may receive, but remorse will soon follow afterwards.  We've done this too many times in the past and it's never worked out to our advantage.

It's okay to say "no thank you" and it's okay to decline a night out that would be harmful to your health.  As a recovering addict, many relatives and friends of mine wanted to go out and eat, drink, and eat some more and drink some more as well.  I cannot entertain that way of life anymore.  I am strong enough to go out and have a sensible meal and perhaps a cup of coffee, or a tall glass of ice water with lemon, but if our relatives and friends find it frustrating and just downright bored with the idea you're not joining in, that's on them and not on you.  As I'm branching out and expanding my social circles, I'm achieving balance in my life.  Balance is essential for me to remain true and stay on track.  I love and care about my relatives and friends, but I also care about my well-being, and if I have to take care of my needs first, so be it.

I'm not saying that it's a selfish act of what I'm doing, but it's knowing my strengths and weaknesses that lead me in the right direction.  I'm satisfied with my decisions and comfortable enough with myself to enjoy my own company when I need time alone to do what I need to do in order to remain healthy.

Take care of yourself first, and you'll be happy you did!

Linda Hegedus

When Did You Wake Up?

I can recall a time when all that mattered was what I was going to eat that day.  It consumed my mind most of the time just thinking about my next meal, the anticipation and reward I felt at that time.  I knew on a subconscious level I was slowly destroying my body and accepted a life of defeat, hopelessness, and despair.  I had taken my life for granted and cheated death.  I was able to still walk pain free, drive, run errands, these tasks were doable.  Then as each year passed by and I continued to gain weight steadily, I thought if I didn't think about my body and my existence that it would just go away.  I stored every mirror in my home in the attic so I didn't have to see what I've done.

Fourteen years' later I had a wake-up call.  My body finally surrendered...broke down....pain, discomfort, unable to do a simple task for myself.....I woke up.  We had gone up to Maine that weekend and stayed at the Lake, and the full bath downstairs had a full-length mirror.  When I stepped out of the shower,  I couldn't help but see my body up close and personal.  Well, I stepped out of the shower, very carefully since one leg up made my body unstable, and the weight distribution was not evenly proportioned on my body.  When I looked at my body that I haven't seen in many years, I was shocked and saddened by what I had created for myself.  All of those years finally caught up with me by the debilitating pain and lack of overall motion, in addition to a morbidly, cellulite-filled, rash-ridden, person staring back at me.  I was too stunned to cry, and too numb to accept this reflection.  It was so much easier to hide than to face myself.

I thought to myself that if I do lose a lot of weight, my body is going to really become loose since I've apparently stretched my stomach out to the point of drooping over my pelvic area, and my breasts were hanging down and were very heavy to carry as well.  Every part of my body was stretched out and the cellulite was tremendous.  I looked away and from that day on I looked at myself for what I actually done by avoiding the reality of my demise.

I've been maintaining my goal weight for the past five years and play with six pounds depending on the types of food I'm eating that can cause water weight gain.  I can only maintain each day and strive to remain focused on keeping my personal goal in sight.  I've never remained at my goal weight for this amount of time, and I've finally become this close to the half-way mark.  I've made it to the five-year personal milestone.  My long-term goal is for every five years and remaining at my ideal weight, will be a milestone. Perhaps I'll take a trip far away to celebrate.  The longest time in my life that I was able to keep my weight off was going back 20 years ago, and I only lasted 1 year and 11 months.  I didn't quite make the two-year mark, but I am thinking right now, wow, five years.  Something must have changed within me to remain true to myself and this journey.

My skin surprisingly "bounced" back quite well, and I am very grateful since it was looking like there would be no way my skin wouldn't hang.  I worked on strength training a few days per week, in addition to doing an activity that would keep my body in good shape, and my mind occupied on other activities.  It's been working for many reasons.  As I slowly rewired my way of thinking about food, I've turned my attention inward and asked myself what do you want to do today that will give me joy?  I keep myself busy with activities that are physically demanding, but rewarding.  I love to soak in the natural Vitamin D and hydrate all day long.

Every small change you make in the project we'll call us....is a pathway to a different destination with a new beginning.  We look different, and feel different, and are moving towards a new life that we're able to accept because we've slowly walked away from our old beliefs about ourselves, and our old beliefs about food, and our old beliefs about self-destruction.  We answer the why's, and question the what's, and resolve our hearts to receiving love and joy.  We've given most of ourselves away, and there was nothing left for us.  We slowly made time for ourselves, to be with ourselves, and enjoy ourselves.  We have introduced the old with the new and they are coming together to make the best of both worlds.

When we finally find out why, we can tread carefully and not allow our old attitudes and old patterns to emerge.  In recognizing these occurrences is half of the battle.  We know what the cues are, and can deflect the urges, knowing what the true consequences will be.

We're free to do as we wish!

Linda Hegedus, ©

The Key

Many times in our lives, the stressors of life can seem unbearable.   We need to do what it takes to maintain a place of peace within our souls.  The people we're surrounded by that are negative, the workplace politics become chaotic, and the lies told about us others believe.  How much can we take before we feel we're going to break?  Food is no longer an option to turn to when feeling overwhelmed with the challenges we face.  For many of us, even though we are living our personal truth, it's not in sync with the majority who are on the opposite side of the fence.  Are we facing many emotional challenges at once?

Is this a test of our will?  Is this a test of our strength?  Is this a test of our overall well-being?  Will we pass this test and come out a much stronger and humbled person?  Are we being blocked from love and goodness?  How long will this test go on?  How many more opponents are we going to have to rise above and be kind to in return?  How many more times will our opposition try to bring us down to their level?  What shall we do?  Should we pretend to be unhappy to protect ourselves from further attacks of our spirit?  Should we face our fears and speak our truth?  Are we supposed to learn a valuable lesson?  Has this pattern happened over and over throughout our lives?  Do we attract people who don't have our best interest at heart, but are plotting and scheming to take us down?

How will we deal with jealously?  How do we deal with the angry people around us?  How do we deal with adversity?  How do we deal with pretentious people?  How do we know who has our back?  Everyone looks the same?  How do we break the pattern?  Will our belief system change?  Have we lost faith in our fellow man?

ABSOLUTELY NOT!  We will walk through the flames of emotional hell, and reach for the light.  The light will take us to a place of comfort, calmness, tranquility, love, grace, hope, and self-confidence.  When we seek a place of solitude, we can quietly meditate and speak softly to our inner-being.  Ask our questions out loud and patiently and quietly receive our answers.  There's no human being on the face of this Earth that can give us the answers we seek to find.  Our answers come from ourselves.  If we listen closely to what our hearts are telling us in the moment of our personal emotional crisis, we'll hear the answers loud and clear.  We think we don't know the answers, or don't want to hear the truth, but we are true to one person, and that is ourselves.  We cannot lie to ourselves, that would be denial.  We and we alone have the answers.  We and we alone can triumph and be victorious.  We and we alone can overcome anything.  Yes we can!  We have many emotional trials to go through in our lifetime, but we will survive.  We always do and always will!!!!

Look how far we've come from where we were!  We've learned how to accept what comes our way, and decide in that very moment what we'll tolerate and what we will not tolerate.  We hold the key to the door of our future.  With this key we will unlock the door, walk inside, and find a better place for us to be.  We got it!  We finally understand!  We have the life skills, and knowledge to succeed with our lives!  Be proud, be who you really are, and remain optimistic!  We deserve to be respected, we deserve happiness, we deserve love, we deserve goodness in our lives!  We deserve only the best!  We've given so much of ourselves to others with love, kindness, and respect, now it's time to receive.  Receive with a grateful and loving heart.  Love will always keep you strong, love conquers all.  Love and only love will keep us safe!  We are the masters of our destiny!

May Peace and Love Be With You!

 

Linda Hegedus©